Thursday, June 23, 2011

DEAR LIARS and CHEATERS

One is lonely. Not cool. 
This world is full of lies. People lied almost every day of their lives. Lied to their spouse, lied to their children, lied to their friends and what more to say, so easy to lie to strangers. 

Example; a husband lied to a wife; coming back late always because he said working overtime. The truth was he went out dating another woman. That's a lie that hurt when the truth revealed to the wife. It might break a marriage and cause harm to the children's quality of life. 

Another example; a child lied to his/her parents about going to tuition classes. In fact he/she was at the cinema with friends while skipping tuition classes. This is the kind of lie that is only damaging to self progression. Because the child will not have a good result in his/her exam and causes a great loss to his/her parents financially for paying the tuition fees for nothing. In a long run, it's affecting the child's own future and the parents trust towards him/her.

One completes the other.
I hate liars most of all because lies hurt people more than a dagger hurt the flesh. The scar can not be seen of course, but it was there, always. Lying only show that you are a selfish person who does not think of others. So never ever lied to your loved ones. Telling the truth hurts but for only awhile. The longer it was kept, the deeper is the wound and the bigger is the scar. Better tell your story now than leave it until it got infested with pus. Get what I mean. 

Some people tried to justify their lie as a white lie. They say, we lied for the betterment of all parties concern. What so white about lying? Nothing good came out from lying as far as I live this life. I have encountered many. For example, in a relationship, not telling facts are considered not lying. Would you agree with that? People say, I did not lie, I just keep mum, did not tell anything or only telling part of the story. That's all. Well... in my dictionary, not telling in order to make people think otherwise is as good as lying. As simple as that. Liars like to twist the facts to make it look okay and to justify the negative doings of their selfish acts.  

With the other half, one moves better.
The easiest example in this scenario is a Muslim husband that has another family with another woman. Simply said, he got married to another woman without telling the first wife about it. Finally the wife got to know and it hurts the marriage. So tell me, was this considered a lie or not? To the first wife, it was a lie every single day of her husband's marriage to the other woman. The truth that came out later hurt deeper than any wounds to the first wife and may be has effect to the children (if any) as well. Would you agree with me? 

Well... I leave it to you all to think wisely. I will not give any more examples because it's unnecessary. Everyone should be able to understand fully the consequences of their own action, in this case about lying. Let's move on, shall we. 

In my blog, my intention is always to share good stuff that is beneficial to all human kind that has the literacy of reading a blog posting. I only want to spread love and good sharing of information to all. Hope I still have followers out there. It's been such a long time that I had written any good posting. Always so self-engrossed with my own life's miseries. And the climax was the demised of my beloved mother. 

One half can lean on to the other half. 
My favourite colour is sky blue and white. As the beautiful blue sky and the white clouds. It sooth my heart and soul looking up all the time. I just love it. I love my roses too. It's the greatest creation by God. So beautiful and serene. The best flowers on earth.

I feel deeply about everything in this world. About life, about other people's life, about my life definitely. May be I could be a good writer one day. Great feelings should be shared and lessons learned should be taught. I believe that everyone has different life's lessons and each one is incomparable with the other. So sharing it would be the best so that others will learn something from it. I want to write a book someday. With a pseudo name, so nobody will ever know. That will be my retirement plan :) 

I was never lucky in relationship so far, but from it, I learned a lot. One of the most important in any relationship is trust and never ever break that trust. Once broken, considered gone forever. Another thing is lots of love and show that love to your significant other. Loving without proof of that feeling is as good as being stupid and a loser for a fact. Knowing that the other person loves you is not enough in any relationship. You had to feel the love in order to be able to feel loved and love more. You get what I mean? 
One do fun stuffs together.

Do simple stuffs like hugging with affections, listening more with empathy, remembering important dates, practising saying thank you whenever the other person do stuff for you, a peck on the cheek before going to work or before going to sleep and etc. Lots of simple and inexpensive stuffs you can do to show your feelings to your other half. 

Most men think that women should be content with what they have as long as their men gave them the roof for shelter, money for her needs and other material stuffs for her amusements. Well.... the theory is very wrong. Why do you think all the stories about Mak Datin/Puan Sri or Rich People's wife go for a gigolo or have extramarital relationship behind their husbands back? Materially speaking, they all had enough, right. Apart from may be the husband is too old for them or they marry because of money, than it's obviously because they are looking for TLC (tender, love and care) outside of home. The husband failed to give that to them for being too busy getting the TLC from other women as well. In this case, you can call it equal deceit. 

True love should never been tarnished with LUST. Lust is not Love. True love means being faithful, honourable and trustworthy to the other. Other commendable characters in story of true love are being accountable and protective. Like in many fairytale of a knight and a damsel in distress. Like that lah (:

Wow, look who's giving advice about love. I think I should stop now or I can never stop talking and talking. 

Have a nice read. Chiow! 
   




One is made for the other and two is actually one. Cool :)

Thursday, June 09, 2011

30 days and I still miss you so much

Mak during Mother's Day 2008
The Summit Hotel Subang Jaya
 Today is the 30th day of my mom passing away. I can't help being a bit down. I miss her so very much. It's hard to accept her departure that's so sudden. I am not ready yet to lose her. The thoughts of God knows what's best for us and it's our duty to accept and let go, I console myself that way. Knowing that's she's in a better place. May Allah rest her soul in peace, in Jannatul Firdhaus. She deserves it. I will pray for her till this life ends. 

My Mak with sister, Lyn during Father's Day 2008
The Summit Hotel Subang Jaya 
The first thing when I wake up in the morning, and the last thoughts in my mind before sleep was for my Mom. She's a truly the Queen of my heart. The most genuine of hearts I have ever known. I don't want to cry because I know in my religion, it's not good to cry for the departed. That was God's will. Our time has been set in this world. I understand that, but someone please tell me, how not to cry? How not to cry for someone that is so close to you your whole life. 
During Eid 2008

When I was afraid of the dark, my Mom was there to accompany me. When I was sick, my Mom took care of me. When I feel nobody cares, my Mom showed me, she cared more than anyone else in this world. When I was losing hope, my Mom gave me courage and motivation to carry on. She never really scolded me her whole life. Instead I raised my voice many times towards her. She forgave me every time. There was never shortage of love and devotion towards her children. When I was short of money, my Mom gave me money. When I made bad choices in life, she still forgave me and encouraged me to move on. She never let me down. Where can I find another person like this? How not to cry for her? How not to miss her? Tell me. 

True love. Mak and Abah during my brother's wedding in 2005
 When I was small about to start schooling, I had problems at school. I was a weird shy little person. My Mom sat with me in the classroom until I was in my Standard 2 (8-year old). Two years my family had tried to get me into school but I was too stubborn and shy to attend one. I will not go unless my Mom go with me. But finally, she made me understand the importance of education and I excelled tremendously afterwards. She patiently encouraged me to be brave and and not to be afraid of anything. I got my first education from my Mom. She thought me everything about life. Her whole life was dedicated towards her children. And I will never ever going to forget that. 

I adore her so much. I want my generation to know what a wonderful person my mother was. She had great character that should be amulet by anyone who is to become a Mom someday. Besides being a Supermom, she was also an entrepreneur. She had her own food business. She started a frozen food business all by her own effort and it was a great success. Many of my friends had tried her products and liked it a lot. It was sold at a wonderfully reasonable price. I am happy that now my eldest sister Along is continuing my mom's legacy in frozen food. 

My Mom's frozen food business was running successfully until she started to lose her energy and fell really ill in 2009. However, the wealth that she gained from her business, never much spent on herself, instead, she was a philanthropist who spent a lot on poor people in the village she stayed in. Sometimes, we would borrow money from her and of course she would never ask it back.  She always advised us in business we should never overpriced our customer. We should always be afraid of God, so never ever overpriced nor cheat our customers. She said in every profit, there should always be part of it that should go to the poor. She reminded us always to pay Zakat in order to prosper in life. This advice, I will never forget and shall preach to all my generations to come. 
Mak was a funny person. Nobody jokes like my Mom.
We enjoyed all her jokes because it was spontaneous and genuine. 

I miss her laughter whenever we told her silly jokes or when she made a spontaneous joke that made us all laughing like crazy. She likes to sing when she does her work. She can make a child sleep with her soothing voice. I miss that too. I miss laying on bed with her every time I came home for a visit. It was always her bedroom and beside her I lay to tell her stories and she told me hers. Sometimes, all of us siblings fought to have the best spot on bed  beside our mother to catch up with news. 

I miss all her nagging about getting married to the right guy that will look after me. I thought I will have the chance to snap wedding photos with my father on the rightside and my mother on the leftside. I thought she would be around to witness it. I thought I still have the time. I thought.... HOW WOULD I KNOW!

Now, it's just a thought. I feel so much alone. Never in my whole life I would imagine this time would come. I am so alone. So so lonely without my mother. I love her so much. I will miss her until I myself leave this world. May Allah have mercy and bless her soul. She deserve Jannatul Firdhaus for all the good and sacrifices she made. Amin... 

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My mind says:

  • "I CHOOSE TO LOVE EVERYTHING THAT IS MINE"
  • If it's not you, who else!
  • Love your country. Keep it SAFE & GREEN...